When there isn't any other options, you just have to make another option yourself.

Oh, I've been dead from blogging for quite a while now. Boredom has the power to drive people to blog. Odd? I say no.

Life has been boring for me, if not down. Holidays weren't as fun as they used to be, but then again, being in Form 6 requires you to sacrifice some stuff. It's a choice you have to make. Oh well.

Did pretty well for my finals. Being somewhat a perfectionist, I didn't think I did pretty good. Yes, everybody wants that coveted 4-flat CGPA. Getting there is no easy feat, I must say. This means I've got to let go of a lot of things and use my free time solely for studying. Oh, does that sound awesomely pathetic.

Oh, I was supposed to go to Japan earlier this month, right after Sis finishes her SPM examination. To my horror, the trip was cancelled. Yup, cancelled. The boss of the travel agency was a cheat. Liar. In fact, he managed to cheat about RM 300000 from just one particular tour group to Europe. Awesome money! Don't learn from these two lousy bosses. Both of them were caught by the police when the police report was made by a few dissatisfied customers of the group going to Europe. Hope he had a fun time sitting in jail. Oh, he was bailed out of jail 2 weeks later, if I didn't mention earlier on.

As for the person I'm currently having a crush on. Oh, you just have to make the decision to open up. If you don't, then you're just choosing to imprison yourself in loneliness. 'nuff said.

XO

=CHIcken WINGs=

Hm...

Feeling so awesome after the dance practice for Christmas. It's this time of the year again. No, I don't really feel oh-so-high about this occasion. The only significance is the birth of Jesus, the Saviour of Mankind into the world. And as it is, the true birth date of Jesus is, as approximated by scientists, more specifically, astrophysicists, to be in the month of April.

So, what is Christmas, truly? As we grow older, simple things can become the mother-of-all questions. When I was a kid, Christmas was all about spending time with my loved ones, gifts and nice, cosy dinners. As time goes by, I realise that bonding time with my loved ones became more important and significant. I realise I wanted to fall in love, besides having my family and friends... This year has been pretty harsh for me, especially in what people call "love life".

Yes, I've been trying to get over this crush I'm in love with. Impossible. Not only with me. Come on, you know it. :D I've told my buddies that are in the same situation with me. Sometimes, there are moments in life where you have to let go and move on with your life. Love doesn't mean that you have to earn that person's love. If you can love the person, then let him or her live happily. Don't burden him / her, if you want to see them happy. Hell, I'm in this situation and I sound like some love-guru. WaTF.

That aside. This Christmas, all I want is just to spend time with those I care for. Just tell me you love me and how much you care for me. I'll be satisfied with that right up until the March of year 2011. Kidding. A pink G-SHOCK will make me happy. Purple vinyl jacket? Black rose ring made out of black perspex only. Hm. Aviators with yellow frame. Er, multi-coloured sneakers? Oh, that's too much.

Oh well, blah-blah too much. Wanna' see me dance? SMS me if you wanna' come to my church. XOXO

=CHIcken WINGs=

I wish. Hm.

Yes, I wish it was me. But then, it doesn't matter to me anymore. If things were meant to be good, it would turn out good.

I'm a little lost. But it's okay. I have buddies, family members and God to tell me that all is alright, and the sun will still rise and set like it always did. Nothing is too hard, nor nothing is too easy. Life is just all about ups, downs, love and most importantly living your life like you mean it. If you live your life happily, I believe God will be most delighted being, to enjoy seeing His creation be in such euphoria.

Right now, I have to be a little serious. Heart's a little sad, emotions spinning out of control. Hm.

Loves.

It's still incomplete without you.

=CHIcken WINGs=

PFFT.

I'm so really happy today. :) Well, initially. Someone said to me that I'm the greatest gift ever. :) AWW, how sweet could that be? Well, at least that made my day all the more meaningful.

:) At least I had a reason to smile until the day ended. Well, it didn't turn out that way. :(

Someone chose something else over me. Pretty heartbreaking. No, I'm not seeking out attention. I'm not an attention freak. I'm just a person with my own style and creativity. Maybe we're from different worlds. I still do like you, but I think I should like you a little less. :'( It's not even an organic life-form. Oh well, sometimes I'm worth much less than material things, I guess. Whatever. Eyes are calling me to slumberland, while my heart keeps telling my "STAY AWAKE", because I'm a little too hurt to even sleep.

Nights, to the world. Have a good day tomorrow peeps, I hope.

=CHICken WINGs=

Shock value.

I'm dumbstruck. Really. I'm pretty lost. At one moment, I get warm and close responses from AHEM. The next moment, it's like my whole connection to you is just cut off like that. Like, SNAP! No more. Please, it's killing me. It's not even a wee bit nice.

But then. Ah. Whatever. Shocking to me really. I've never been so lost in my life before. I never had problems like this before. Now, my health isn't doing me good, studies isn't really all that good. And love, is painful. =.=

Whatever-lah. Having a bunch of super-loving friends helps alleviate the pain a little. I'd love to name my buddies, but better not. :(

XoXo

=CHIcken WINGs=

Few things.

Sad things. Yeah. They happened. I am upset. I hope you're not really doing this to me. :(

And there are a few tiny stuffs to make it a little less painful. :)

Should I be happy? No.

Appreciative? Yes.

=CHIcken WINGs=

I'm going to miss you.

The two months holidays are coming. I enjoy seeing you everyday in school, but I'm not brave enough to approach you. Am not ready to confess. And even if I do confess, we being together might not be possible...

But I really do have feelings for you. Will you open up your heart for me? :(

This is my song dedication to you, just to kill the agonizing pain of not seeing your smile for two months.



='(

=CHIcken WINGs=

Maybe, just maybe.

Yeah, just maybe.

I'm too greedy. Am I asking for too much? Unfortunately, I do think so. :( Why am I always wrong?

I should lock myself up in an asylum then. What's the point of me surviving like this?

=CHIcken WINGs=

Bad Dreams.

Awakened by a bad dream.


I thought I lost you.


Fear.


Thank God it was only a dream.


Losing you, an unbearable thought.


Everything is still OK.


Don't leave too soon, alright?







......... *sobs*






=CHIcken WINGs=

One chance wouldn't hurt, won't it?

We talked. I tried. You didn't notice. I guess one shot was not enough. Should I try again?





=(





Oh well. Doesn't change how I feel towards you.

=CHIcken WINGs=

Untitled #7

I'm getting really lazy at thinking for catchy blog titles. Not that it helps capture a lot of attention. BLAH. I'm sick. Like literally sick. Sore throat, coupled with runny nose, back ache and a little headache. Making me feel so light-headed right now. T^T

Updating blog to kill time, and also to update a little about my findings over the past two weeks.

Exams have come and gone. Finals wasn't that horrifying. It wasn't that brain-friendly too. Was albeit tough with a tinge of fun, I'd say. But anyways, really hoping for the best for my results, at least give me an A for my Chemistry. IT'S MY FAVOURITE SUBJECT! Maths was easier than I thought it wouldn't be. Frankly speaking, the notion of sitting for General Paper and Mathematics exam would scare the crap outta' me. Not because I can't do it, I just can't put a finger on what I'm trying to do! =.= Talk about being completely lost yet so in control of what you're doing. PFFT.

Missing that *ahem* eventhough I get to see *ahem* everyday... Short to say, love isn't going to work if it's a "tepuk sebelah tangan" thing. Even a moth knows this. :( FML when it comes to love life...

Am really grateful to know that God has placed great people in my life. And yes, people do come in and out of my life. Those who leave were meant to leave, and those who came in and stayed, were meant to be always with me. My presence in SMK Jinjang was also by divine appointment. I didn't get in there by chance. And the people I have met there, the things that happened there, were also of God working, not mere karma.

And by the way, a special paragraph dedicated to Josh. HAPPY BIRTHDAY! Be the sweet fella' you'll always be, and God bless You in your undertakings. Study hard, play hard and may He bless you with a partner real soon. ;) XOXO

What else? More classes and catching-up with homework? FML

Hugs and kisses for my readers. ;)

=CHIcken WINGs=

Untitled #6

*wipes digital dust off blog*

How long has it been since I last updated my blog? 10 days? 10 days in digital time is like eons in humans years. Time for another update.

Anything that stood out the past few weeks? Well, TOUCH Camp 2010? May not be able to attend it. Bummer. BUMMER. *shrilling scream* Yes, thanks a lot, extra classes, you make me stupid. :(

And well, became closer to some friends, while made distant a few that weren't totally friendly or those who are taking friendships for granted. Friendship is a mutual thing, not a one-way thing, so if I dump you, means we are of different frequencies. Yeah. I'm not changing myself to fit yours, and you don't have to change to fit my frequency. It won't work out anyway. ;)

And during small, tiny periods of "downness", I've found who my true buddies were. You know who you guys are, no mentioning names. Might invoke jealousy. ;) But I really love you guys. And I mean it. :D

Love life, still a one-way communication. Or more of a "I-have-a-crush-on..." thing. Ala "tepuk sebelah tangan" as people would say. And yes, if I can make a wish, I just want to be with you. :( Miss J much.

BLAH. Anyways, life goes on as usual. Finals coming up. Talk about mad-exam rush, ain't no going to help make me any more sane. =.=

LOVES. BIG HUGS.

=CHIcken WINGs=

Hm. Trickery?

Gosh. What are you thinking, actually? I hate extended suspense. :(

Jin Wen. Sorry. :( Was tad moody a few days ago. Wasn't anything to do with you. Just some other things made me unhappy. Smile okay?

:)

=CHIcken WINGs=

Updates. Updates. Who doesn't love them?

Yeah. Some short updates about life...

Let's start from today shall we?

Hmmm. Started off the day ( 2nd of October 2010 ) rather moody. I've been pretty moody the past two weeks. I'm not sure what's the reason. Wait I'm sure of what's the reason, but I'm not really taking action to tackle the problem, or as in what people would say, nip the problem in the bud. But sorry, I don't do botany nor gardening. FML I say.

Mathematics is a pile of bullcrap. Bear that thought in mind, wherever you may go. It's pretty interesting, but how often do you use it in your daily life? Does it take rocket science to just peel a bulb of garlic. I think not. :)

The past week was pretty lukewarm. A couple of ups and downs. None of which is big enough to cause me to go all euphoria nor depressed. Hell yeah I'm more depressed than I'm happy now.

Couple of friends have been asking me about weird questions, like "Who do you like?", "Complicated relationship status? WHO?" and questions that sound oh-so-the-same in that category. Yeah refer to my current relationship status in facebook just to be sure. That's if you added me. :)

Well, let me briefly describe what's going on. Well, I suppose that this is what IS really going on. Well, I'm currently having a crush on somebody. [OH YEAH, YOU READ RIGHT! So move on] And... This is really one of the reason I'm being moody and down-in-the-not-so-dumps. The person that I'm having a crush on isn't really giving me responses. In fact, all I got were cold shoulders. Coupled along with some one-two word replies. I say. OUCH.....

And there's another thing. I guess two girls have a crush on me. HUH?! ME? I'm not that attractive at all. I'm so annoying I can make the Earth spin out of axis. Me? Oh you got to be making October Fool's pranks on me. I didn't assume at all. That's what my friend told me. But anyways, those two girls are cute. :) Any guy would melt, well maybe not literally, when they smile. :) But. I don't know. Wait for crush to respond. Go ahead tackling one of the girls. Study? Only God knows what's good for me.

All I want now is for my heartache to go far, far away and my lost brain cells to come back to me. I'm dying when it comes to studies. Give me an oxygen tank for my birthday next year. DROWNING. =X


=( My brain tells me to let go, but my heart is locked onto you. KEYS! WHERE THOU ART GONE?


=CHIcken WINGs=

UH-OH!

Blogging about this soon? OMG I'm falling in love again? :( DISLIKE!

UPDATED VERSION.

Nothing much to say. :D

Celebrated Mid-Autumn Festival with my classmates not too long ago. Last Tuesday, perhaps? :D Best one ever! Love you guys, A LOT! XOXO

And, I'm falling in love. Again. Yuckie. *rolls eyes*

Would love to post more, but the rain isn't doing good to me. URGH. Needless to say, I love my friends, family and *AHEM~ :D* a lot. :)




XOXO

=CHIcken WINGs=

Youth Camp: TOUCH Camp 2010 Logo prototype.

Camp logo prototype. Everybody, join this year's TOUCH Camp for a time of fun with God and friends. See you there? :)

Sorry. Epic case of "Diluah mati bapa, ditelan mati ibu."

An update to calm my emotions a little.

School's having a two-weeks break for Hari Raya. Ah, some space to breathe. Well, that's what I thought. And yes, then comes something called holiday assignments. Oh great, there goes the break. And yes, there was a bunch of homework splashed upon us, as if homework were a blessing to us. Blessing in disguise, I hope.

Ah, there is one thing that's still troubling my deepest emotions. Well, it isn't that bad, but for one as emotional as me, it stirs my emotions mad. Should I say insecurity? Perhaps.

This incident went on like this:

On Tuesday [14th September 2010], I went for lunch with Wai Yan, Evon and Josh. Well, all things were fine. Yes, very fine up until the moment when I blurted a stupid statement. "How would I know if Josh ever dated before?". Yes, as harmful as the statement may sound, it made the conversation a hell lot more awkward. Well, this is an insider thing that I shouldn't divulge freely out to the public... But I just want to apologize because I didn't know much about the past of my buddies in SMK Jinjang, much because of the fact that I'm new there. Many secrets were kept in vaults that I could not access yet. The whole fact that Wai Yan told me yesterday [15th September 2010] made it all clear to me...

Evon, sorry-lah okay? Can't tell you every single thing because... There's this Malay proverb that goes, "Diluah mati bapa, ditelan mati ibu". I should shut up so I wouldn't ruin any relationship.

And Josh. Sorry too-lah. Forgive my ignorance...




And I think I should just shut my mouth and play statuette. No point talking so much already. Could hurt many more hearts, thanks to my ignorance.

Yes, we cannot avoid the fact that we do hurt the feelings of others sometimes, but these people are to dear to me, I can't bear the thought of even making them sad. Ouch I'd say...

I could use some hard liquor right now. =(

*sighs*

I think I should sign off. For now. Love you peeps.

=CHIcken WINGs=

I'M LOADED! With homework...

WOOTS! Holidays just knocked on my door this morning. HELLO YOU! Yes, finally the holidays have arrived! Well, it was all good until the second the teacher goes, "OKAY! This period of two weeks means homework for you all!" And that means 10 General Paper essays to complete. Coupled along with oh-so-fabulous Mathematics questions to complete. Oh, high-school, high-school.

PHEW. The past few weeks have been like a mad rat-race. Assignments to complete, projects to think of and experiments to carry out. PHEW! Biology experiments are especially tiring and annoying. When do you get to see students clad completely in white, going around the school compound to collect MOSS. Yes, moss. Funny I say! ;D Well, it was all in the name of science and FUN!!!

Mathematics hasn't been really friendly to my brain. In fact, most of the I have learnt so far, I don't really know how to apply it in real life! Like, who uses sigma notation in daily life? Well, not yet for me of course. URGH. Maths is a killer! :D

Love life has been dull. :O Met a few nice people. Nice enough to ERRR. Well. Nice enough to go on a date and to date with. But, alas, I'm not ready for it. IT'S TOO COMPLICATED! :D *shoots himself with a Magnum*

I SICKED MYSELF. Don't know why. Sickly season for many I guess. Weather hasn't been great altogether. Hot one moment, cold and wet the next. *rolls eyes*

LOTSA LOVES!

=CHIcken WINGs=

Talk about Mad Hatter.

It's about time school cut down on insanity, especially when students are in the school compound. It makes you wanna' go nuts and start a rampage, first with destroying teachers' car tyres, devouring the exhaust pipes like fries and eating the windshield as if you're crunching on ice. Urgh...

Yes, the pile of homework is as numerous as the number of bacteria on the legs of a cockroach. Yeah, "EEEEWWW" you may go, but that's the way it is. URGH. :D But at least friends and some support from m family members alleviate the stress, at least a little.

Things are starting to get busy. Who in the whole quasar would know that I would be picked as club treasurer. Yeah, WTF I say. *giggles* I can't even remember accounts. I think. Co-curricular activities getting busy, too. Lessons in class complement the already-mounting stress that we face. Ah, euphoria I say. ;)

An what's with so many a-la schizophrenic teachers in school?! GOSH, they freak me out. Makes my butt go out of alignment. *rolls eyes* Ah, the sound and sight of high-school, who could resist the joy it gives us. *self-slaps*

There's still cuties out there waiting to be approached. Should I try? At least for once? *Conscience speaks: Wing, you damn gatal punya budak!*


OOOH, love you readers so much. ;)


=CHIcken WINGs=

AGES and AGES ago. :)

Yesh, I haven't been blogging for ages. Heck, lots of people haven't been touching their blog pages in ages. What in cotton candy's sake are they doing anyways?

Ha, my life has been in an up and down recently. Hmm. Yeah. But life is still awesome as usual. Today's Christian Fellowship club meeting was mind-stimulating. It made me a little happier.

Losing my writing skills. Need to regain those over-the-top hyperbole writing style. Help me will you? *LOVES*

CHIcken WINGs

Online Blog Death. OBD. :D

My blog has been dead for almost two weeks on end. SO DEAD. TEEHEE. Yeah. Didn't have much motivation to write anything at all. Mostly because school has been so tiring and stressful. And nothing interesting has happened, much.

Pfft. I'm trying to study real hard, but nothing's helping a lot. SELF-STUDY is so tiring. Braindead. :D

To those of you who have been with me when I was a little down for these two weeks, LOVE YOU PEOPLE! [Nate especially! :)]


LALALALA~


=CHIcken WINGs=

TEEEHEEE!

As I have said, I will edit this post! :D

Well, two weeks ago, something very hilarious happened. A fellow said he forgives my sister and I. Well, the thing is, he was the one who was in the wrong. I was so totally stunned by that statement. Stunned because it was too funny! I mean, he was so PERASAN. Like come on, don't you have a mirror at home? The smirk on your face is so like the plastic wrapper of my tissue packet, which I throw into the dustbin once I'm done with it.

Sad case for him 'cause he's such a desperado. Pity, pity, pity. *TSK TSK TSK TSK TSK* It doesn't matter if you wanna' bad-mouth any of us. It doesn't work at all. And it's a pity for those who trusts in you just because of your pathetic Grammy-award wannabe whines and gestures. That is so fag. Get a life. TEEHEE! Seriously, that fellow lacks a mirror at home. He doesn't even know how PERASAN he is. Well, to those of you who know my sister and I, this would be the funniest story of the year! :D

Well, he's got a lot of lameness to get rid off. He's so lame he can make a lame person runaway. LALALALA~ You may need crutches, too. *hands over crutches* *cringes in pain because of the "lame" aura surrounding him*

Oooh, go get yourself some lalafication and stop thinking the world revolves around you. If it did, it would spin out of orbit. *shrieks!*

LALALALA. I empathise with your situation. :)

+CHIcken WINGs+

Attempted. Phail. Trying again.

First try was a failure. PHAILED. Was quite a whammy for me. Why you had to go just like that? It's pretty unfair, but I'm going to try again. You wanna' stop me? Over my dead chickens. :)

Life's like Nano-Nano candies. It's sweet, sour and salty.

ASEAN School Youth Games, here we come! [Not to play, only helping out. Hope to skip school~ ]

Love you peeps, a lot. ;)

-CHIcken WINGs-

Please, don't regret later on.

When you see someone you think you'll love, go and take the chance to say "Will you be mine?

Don't regret later on.

Don't be like me. :(

=CHIcken WINGs=

Aww. :)

Has been a pretty hectic week I must say. SMK Jinjang had its open day today. Helped to mod up classroom. Wahoo, it's much more conducive now. REALLY!

Made a new friend via Facebook. Well, we knew each other, but only got to REALLY know each other after a few weeks. Weird much. But that person is nice. :)

Life's pretty much normal for me. I hate normal-ness, the world knows that. It really gives life the very much hated "YEARGH" factor. Radio hasn't been playing good, catchy songs. TV's a literally becoming an idiot box, filled with programmes fit for idiots. Handphone? Nobody has been replying my messages. Am I such a bore? Pfft. Whatever.

Woo, I've got some artsy assignments to complete and I hope it's going to be flattering and mind-blowing! :D Pre-Uni Council shirt to design, and now waiting for TOUCH 2010 theme to be decided and set, so I can get my hands working.

Mum bought a new Canon Pixma, since the old Epson betrayed its duty to deliver pixel-perfect prints. I LOVE THE PIXMA! Awesome printing speed. And. Awesome! Hope it performs up to its brand reputation, for the many years to come. LALALALA!

Aww, I miss you. Just a little shy.




...of these three, love is the greatest.




Whatever God says, is so totally true.


Peaces out now.


LOVES


=CHIcken WINGs=

WHEE.

Ultraman Dance. Rocked. :D

The mass Ultraman Dance was even more fun. :D

Totally loved that experience. :D

I don't dance too often. So that was totally awesome I'd say. :D

Ah.

We are getting old.

It's high time I made something useful and beneficial out of my youth.

I'm not happy, nor I'm sad. I'm just... Not in the mood to portray any emotions. But I do have only one current emotion now. A longing for someone to [Love]. :)

Yes. One more try. :)

Realised that my blog has a slight increase in the number of followers. :D Thanks peeps, you keep my blog going. :D

Need to change and tweak the music box a little. Music moves fast nowadays. Anybody for more We Are The Fallen music?


I'm so totally annoying my blog readers with "I'm in love" statements and not telling them who the hell I like. HAHA! Sad to say, it's going to happen in this post too. :) Until I'm really with *AHEM*, and only then I shall reveal the mysterious and elusive secrets. :D

WHATEVER~ ^o^

=CHIcken WINGs=

I'm blogging. PFFT.

HOO. Finally getting in synch with the pace of Form 6. Starting was rather bumpy and messy. Well, don't blame me. Had a break since SPM was over right up until the month of June. All my biological clock programming gone haywire, my back problem and my re-noob-ified Maths skills isn't really helping much. Lalalalaa~ What to do? Only can laugh and chuckle my problems away. Oh, with God's help, too.

This week in school was rather fun! *grins from ear to ear* Except the occasion when I was stopped by a bunch of "oh-so-lalafied" prefects that do not know how to define "manners" and "courtesy" at all.

"OI! [note the word OI] BERATUR DALAM SATU BARISAN!"

For Pete's sake, you *AHEM!* could have said it in a much nicer tone. 'Cause not all the people you *AHEM!* called out are in the wrong. You can't blame new students for not having name tags. Didn't anybody taught you that? :D Ish, if you *AHEM!* had respected the students, they would have give you the same win-win respect. What's there to lose anyway? *sighs oh-so loudly*

Whoo! Got back my moolah that Mum borrowed. :D Mum had too much pound and francs but no ringgit, so had to play loan shark a few times. ;) Now then, it's time for total enjoyment now that moolah is in my wallet! :D SMK Kepong Baru carnival, anyone?

Next month, I have one more shot at *AHEM!*. ;D 24th July. Here. I. Come. One more shot I say!

*HUGS*

=CHIcken WINGs=

Inseperable me :O

Holidays are killing me. Its like a vulture swirling around in the sky, staring at you with its mocking eyes, waiting to devour you once your life wastes away. It swoops down, stops. Slowly advances to you and... GASH! Tears your flesh, a strip at a time! WOAH! *runs away*

Maths questions aren't really helping me destress either. Totally WTH moment, really. And Eureka moments around midnight-morning doesn't really help at all. Pfft. Thank God for the holidays! :)

Have been thinking about my future profession, too. Its really driving me nuts and bolts. Where's that spanner. Sighs. I totally wanna' live my childhood dream of becoming a doctor. I don't even mind at all having BSc in Chemistry. At the same time I do totally love arts.

Performing arts, visual arts, architecture, fashion design, business and marketing, hospitality and tourism, mass communication. Like, HECK! What do I do? I'm currently in Science stream in Form 6, loving it. Loving my friends. But then again. *rolls eyes and thinks deeply*

Moving on. I'm not losing that chance again! Going for it! :D You wait and see! *squeals and jumps*

For now, FML partially. :)

=CHIcken WINGs=

P.S: I wanna' watch Chinese opera! Anybody knows where I can't watch one?

Crappy much

Feeling very crappy right now. CPU fried. Have to depend on Mum's laptop to go online and all. Sighs. All my research are now going to be done manually, by hand. Gosh, all the writing.

Holidays are such a bore. I like school. I miss the noise and lessons in school.

But most of all... *sighs*

Nevermind.

Its as if nothing really matters to anybody at all.

Where has all the love in the world gone to anyway?

=CHIcken WINGs=

Of sour grapes and sweet wine.

In life, we tend to get sour grapes now and then. Yes, sometimes it sucks to the max! But little do people know that the sour grapes can be turned into sweet wine, provided that its made using the correct methods.

Sour grapes. I failed to get that coveted JPA Scholarship, even after appealing for it. It doesn't really matter to me anymore, whether they are setting quotas for race, meritocracy or anything. I'm no longer bothered. God has set His plans for me. So what if I fail this? There's many more to come. :) And I'm accepting this fact with a rather open heart. Am thankful because God has given me supportive friends. Ben's mum, Aunty Lydia, even called me up to encourage me. And no, this is not the last of me you'll hear.

Going to continue Form 6. I really hope to obtain at least a 3.9+ CGPA, and also at least a Band 5 for MUET. Mum will definitely be not so happy if I do not even get a Band 5. :P Whatever happens next, God will decide. I'll just dance to His tunes. :D

Sweet wine. Even after being rejected, I reflected and I see what blessings I have currently, and even before I applied for this scholarship. I still have friends. I still have my family.

When I transferred to SMK Jinjang, I was rather worried that I would bring the same karma I had while I was temporarily in MBSSKL. I was worried that I wouldn't have friends. Heck, when I went there, they asked me for my Facebook account the first day I was there! And man, they laugh non-stop. :D Awesome blessing #1.

And looking back for the past 18 years, God has blessed my family TREMENDOUSLY. Literally. Somehow, finance isn't much of a problem in my family. He has always been there to provide. And He has so much money that He can by anytime cause an inflation in the world economy. Talk about too much cashflow but too little products! :D

Blessing #3. Well this ain't a blessing, but I'm so wanting to fall in love right now. Knowing the fact that the person I so like might never ever like me, but being able to feel and share love is something tad wonderful! =) Nevermind rejection. Its just the need to share love. *rolls eyes and smiles*

OOO! I love this song!



Loves

|CHIcken WINGs|

Lovesick birdbrain.

Lovesick. Title says it all. Pfft. Confession time? It'd take me mountains and ridges to confess. This ain't no easy matter. It's darn complicated. Love sickness turning me into a birdbrain, literally. :O Oh well. *smiles* It doesn't change anything.

Playing chef is so not fun. With mum away for a few days, the task of cooking falls on me. ZOMG. Pity my guinea pigs. They have no choice but to chow down whatever that I've made. Haha! Yes, my siblings and Dad. Sad case for them-lah. Apalah yang boleh dilakukan?

OWH. Friends not replying me most of the time. Are they just too busy or what? At least reply once-lah... T^T Ke berlakon busy? *tsk tsk tsk*

=CHIcken WINGs=

We Are The Fallen- St. John

Awesome song. Perfect expression of a insane mind. :D

This night is alive with the smell of insane
It's reaching for me and it's calling my name
I beg for silence to drown out their weep
How did this asylum become where I sleep

So ashamed of waking
All my life you failed to keep me safe
My whole world's forsaken
Won't let you destroy my faith again

All my questions get no answers
Locked up tight from the world outside me
NO, NO
Mommy come get me out tonight
All my questions have no answers
I can feel the fear inside me
NO, NO
Mommy come get me out tonight

So close I almost could taste my own grave
My moment of selfishness caused by your pain
Almost threw this life you gave me away
In this institution for you now I pray

So ashamed of waking
All my life you failed to keep me safe
My whole world's forsaken
Won't let you destroy my faith again

All my questions get no answers
Locked up tight from the world outside me
NO, NO
Mommy come get me out tonight

All my questions have no answers
I can feel the fear inside me
NO, NO
Mommy come get me out tonight

Forgive me
With wings adorn me
So I can fly

All my questions get no answers
Locked up tight from the world outside me
NO, NO
Mommy come get me out tonight
All my questions have no answer
I can feel the fear inside me
Mommy come get me out tonight




=CHIcken WINGs=

Phew. Some breathing space at last!

Many students seem to be paying their attention to the teacher in class.

TEACHER: Okay class, the homework for today are exercises......

And yes, happens during every lesson in class. Phew. Finally a little rest time. Homework has been piling up like crazy! Thanks to the holidays, I now have a little wee bit of chill time. Hmph. I wonder what happened to all my stamina. I get tired easily now and then. Am wondering how I survived Form 5...

There's an annoying compulsion for me to be the best in the class, like always. ISH. Apalah yang boleh dikatakan? Studying Form 6 is like studying at a whole new level. FUH! Youth Service later. Cool. Like so the time to chill and let my hair down [ironically, I don't have much of them].

And in every post, I seem to blast out the fact that I'm in love. *shrugs* Nah, more lovesick than in love. I'd put this as "cinta tidak berbalas".

NYAH.


Anybody keen to go out with yours truly this school break? I can't be staying home 24/7, waiting for mould and moss to proliferate on me. :D

Fuhfuhfuh! Anyways... G'day people!

♥s you!

Wohohoho!

=CHIcken WINGs=


Shh! It's a secret.

A little less emotions, a little more brains.

It's funny how emotions can cloud the most rational of the minds. Sometimes I wished I had a little less emotion, and a whole lot more brains. It sucks when I let my emotions rule over my heart, and not my brain over my heart. Worse to come, occasionally my emotions go overboard and I end up like a volcano, spewing deadly lava and ebony-black ashes that kills relationships with close ones. Sad to say, I'm a rather emotional person, though I tend to hide the softer side of me. And yes, I'm a very soft-hearted person. I hate people talking loudly to me. I hate people betraying my trust [yes, even in terms of TIME PUNCTUALITY]. I hate a load more of other stuffs that in the end, makes me such a softie. Having to turn your personality 180-degrees to suit the people around you is somewhat ridiculous. I do believe that God made us the way He wanted us to be created. There's no point stuffing yourself into a mould that doesn't fit the pattern you were created to be. It is tough having to pretend to be the tough one, when deep inside, YOU know that YOU are not that kind of person. I love it when people say nice things, even if it's just a SINCERE "Good morning", and even a hug can brighten up the dullest of my days. But it seems that the world has grown into a place where love doesn't hold strong anymore.

The modern-day love, as to my point of view, is a disguised form of MATERIALISM. Yes. Whatever the heck I'm saying. Isn't it time to cut the crap on material things, and keep ones that can last a lifetime- relationships? Cherish the people close to you. Love them everyday, as if you were going to leave this place tomorrow. It's definitely hard to do this. I'm having trouble doing this. And I'm having trouble sensing the love people shower on me. Shucks. Padlock this thought in your heart. As God is loving, He still wields a rod in order for us to grow up strong. He may take away someone whom you take for granted, and forever you will regret for never ever taking a moment to cherish the person.

No, I'm not dying. I'm just emo. ;(

Love heals [God's love], love sometimes kill [human love].

=CHIcken WINGs=

It's all in God's blueprint. :)

Have been attending Form 6 classes in SMK Jinjang for almost a week already. I thought I was going to be all lonely there. However... I WAS WRONG! I am thankful that the people there are so friendly and mad! :) Am grateful. I believe God keeps open doors and help wherever I go. And this bunch of friendly people is just the beginning. I believe there are more powerful things that are going to happen. This is JUST the beginning.

I AM a little sad. Again the plain ol' emo reason. Pfft. Attended an art exhibition at KLCC and it was awesome! Who knew art exhibitions can be so eye-opening. I want my artworks to be in galleries ALL AROUND THE WORLD one day.

Totally love my growing circle of friends, but not so much of the scope of my Form 6 studies. TOUGH ARGH.

Love you leh... But aiyo, paiseh dao. X)

=CHIcken WINGs=

Untitled #5

Having mild depression right now. Yesh. I failed to get that coveted JPA scholarship. Hmph. After all the running around. Well, maybe it's fated by God that I don't get it. I'm all okay, maybe He has greater plans in store for me. Still, it's human nature to feel disappointed. I do wish I have friends around to cheer me up, or at least I can get over it with their presence around. =/

Sad to say, I can't always depend on friends alone. *sighs* And now that I'm in Form 6 in MBSSKL temporarily, I don't think I'm blending in well enough with the people there. Is it me, or is it something wrong with them?

Have been feeling a little shitty these few days. It's as if many things I do are wrong. WRONG. It feels like I'm never right. I'm still happy that I have my God-granted talents in me that I can utilise to make me feel less sad and emo. He truly gives everybody talents, and that we may find peace and solace in His gifts to us.

Eye bags getting bigger. More whiteheads and pimples. What else? Urgh. Back to school. FML.

God bless ya' people! Nyeh.

*HUGS*

=CHIcken WINGs=

Rough week I'd say.

Was a rather hard week to survive through I'd say. Going to MBSSKL for a week already. Trip to the school and back is expensive. Long travelling time [an hour to school...]. Having to buy new sets of uniform isn't really helping me a lot.

And Mum's also not in very good mood this week. She's not feeling well. So, she gets a little to worked up sometimes. Doesn't help me improve situations, too.

Money also running low because of the trip to school and back. [RM 4.40 a day, RM 22 a week]. Heck, my Dad works in Kota Kemuning and he doesn't even have to pay any toll!

Joash and May leaving church and TOUCH soon, too. Hey, if both of you are reading this, you absence will be felt once you guys leave. I'm sad that you both are leaving. Sure, people would say there's MSN and Facebook, but what's better than the real deal? But, it's all God's plan, and I'm sure He has reasons for the both of you to be with the Kota Kemuning Christians. And surely His goodness will overtake you wherever the both of you guys are going. Remember to come back and visit, though.

And I'm typing this blog on a rather empty stomach [I'm more blessed than refugees and poor African nations, though.]. Skipped dinner 'cause Mum thought I wouldn't be home for dinner. Damn my phone credit for expiring so early.

Had

.............................. :(

But I'm thankful that He made sure that I was well and safe all the time. He is my awesome provider and Friend. And I'm sure all things will turn out for the good in His name.

And truly it's by Him that I can hang on until this day.


Say something, don't leave me hanging. =/


=CHIcken WINGs=

Turning point at dy/dx=0.

Some stoopid sh*t title there. Turning point of my thoughts about MBSSKL. Initially, it wasn't so good, but now I think I'm liking that school. Well, anything-la. ;) Am quite happy, at least there's friends that follow me there and back, and the trip isn't so boring when going and coming back. But it's tad expensive though.

OMG, We Are The Fallen's album Tear The World Down is out now! Their songs are so awesome! It will take years for the band to reach the Evanescence standard again, but it's still pretty nice for a new band. Number 11 most downloaded album on iTunes since 7 days after it's debut.

I'm a little afraid because I lagging behind most of my counterparts in studies. Need to play catch up. Hate it. But I'm so going to prove to myself that I can do better than them. IT'S JUST FORM 6! RAWR! And while waiting for JPA results to be out, I do have to take that kind of a drastic step to chase, chase and chase my studies! WOAH! OKAY, I'm blabbering sh*t, again.

;) Short post of my week. Chat with me, will you? *winks*

=CHIcken WINGs=

I'm feeling over-the-top.

Urgh. I don't have to repeat the title do I? Perhaps I'm tired and a little lovesick here. Urgh, I'm wondering why is it that so many people are getting lovesick today. Like, SERIOUSLY. It makes me a little emo. You guys are bad, bad kids for making me feel the way you guys feel too. HAHA! Whatever. Have to get busy to sweep these emo-ness off the cliff. :)

I don't know if I said this before, but I think I know who my "realler" friends are. :D You know who you guys are. No names nanti some other friends feel biased. XP But YEAH! You guys are great. I don't know why. Don't ask me. ;)

Check out Voodoo by Adam Lambert. I LIKEY!


Moon shine on the bayou
Love shrine break the taboo
I wanna know what's in your potion
Bound by total devotion

I was lookin' for love all over
You're the hunter and I'm your prey
Now I'm lost in a lover hangover
I try to leave but I have to stay

'Cause it's voodoo voodoo voodoo (under your spell)
'Cause it's voodoo voodoo voodoo (under your spell)

Swamp sings over the bazaar
Snake bites aligning stars
I'm in rapture there is no cure
No sanctuary from your allure

I was lookin' for love all over
You're the hunter and I'm your prey
Now I'm lost in a love hangover
I try to leave but I have to stay

'Cause it's voodoo voodoo voodoo (under your spell)
'Cause it's voodoo voodoo voodoo (under your spell)

'Cause the voodoo you do
Is all that can do
To make me into your fool
'Cause when you do voodoo
I'm just like a doll
That pins keep pushing into

So every time I try to break this trance
I'm almost afraid I'll miss my chance
To be bewitched by the bayou
I just gotta say I want your hex
I don't want to live without your hex
I'm so obsessed with your sexiness

Yeah...

'Cause it's voodoo voodoo voodoo (under your spell)
'Cause it's voodoo voodoo voodoo (under your spell)
'Cause it's voodoo voodoo voodoo (under your spell)
'Cause it's voodoo voodoo voodoo (under your spell)
(So obsessed with your sexiness)



And no, I'm not obsessed with anybody's sexiness. HAHAHAA!

=CHIcken WINGs=

Untitled #4

Urgh. I'm starting to feel the pain of my wisdom grazing against the inner walls of my cheek. Bzzz. I feel like getting a pair of pliers and ripping it off my gums [talk about epic pain here...]. It has been causing me tonnes of annoyance these few days. I can't even open my mouth properly, and without pain. *roars* Let alone eating. Caused me tonnes of trouble eating. T^T Noodles for me. Nothing else. =/

Got offered to enter Form 6 under Methodist Boys' School in KL. It's a double-edged sword here for me. Pros, that school is well-equipped with facilities and teaching equipment. Cons, it'd freaking far from my house, plus the mad city-crawl in the morning, you wouldn't reach school if you were late. I'm hoping for all the love of God in the world to make me end up under a scholarship. I don't want to go to Form 6 by any means possible. =/ But if it's God's will, so be it! :D

Yes. Have been emo these past few days again. WTH man. Must have been the wisdom tooth playing catalyst to breakdown my emotions. *sighs* Swayed all around by my emotions. Same old problem from my recent posts. ZZzzZZ Wished "you" were reading this now. :D

Hmm, that aside. Do you know how awesome Lee McQueen is in design?! OMGX. His designs will make you drool! Like, DROOL! Take a look at a few of his designs here. He's bloody talented I tell you. Sad to say he's now a few feet under. =(







Isn't this like the clutch of your dreams? :D


He's even done a collabo with Puma to produce a mini-range designed by him. ;)




Does this remind you of Evanescence?


And this reminds me of Saphira from Eragon.

When will Malaysia reach this type of avant-garde/high-fashion status? Will make Malaysia an economic-cum-culture powerhouse if it does. Investment on creativity article appeared in the newspapers a few days ago. Is this field included? :D Time to take the risk I say.

Loves.


=CHIcken WINGs=

I hate flashbacks. They make me emo.

Yes. Hate reminiscing on the past. You just can't help it, especially when you're going to relax and all of a sudden all these random memories, both good and bad, start pouring in.

Totally miss the days when school was still on. Like I miss my friends tonnes... It's even harder to contact them now. On MSN, most of the time they're "Away". Sending SMS won't do much either. Some of them reply days after a message was sent, or they might even forget to reply. I only keep in touch with a handful of them. Buddies, if you're reading this, know that I miss you guys a lot[You know who you guys are :D]... If this means anything to you at all.

Ah, I know I can't be caught up in this kind of nonsense all the time. Whatever the shit that means. Well, did well for my Ujian Teori Berkomputer for my L driving license. 44/50. Nearly failed. Eff.

Many close buddies of mine, and those who keep track of my blog know that I'm so wanting to express my feelings to my crush. ZOMG. How do I put this? No I don't have a crush, I have crushes. Bloody "rambang mata", right? See, I'm not greedy... It's just the matter of who really cares for me. *sighs* But then, I have to wait. God will decide what's best for me.

But then. I ♥ you all. [EEWW, that sounds gross coming from me.]. And heck, I don't care if people say I'm bi. :D

Hoping to shit Faberge eggs when I'm asleep tonight.

=CHIcken WINGs=

Routine life? Sorry, am not a big fan of it.

ZOMG. I was still asleep when Brian came to pick me up for Youth Service. "Chi Wing, I'm here already". I stoned a while [a few microsecs to be exact] before I rushed to change my clothes.

Youth Service was OK today, was a little eye-opening, and also rather encouraging to me. I need some encouragement right now. *sighs* But am happy that God is always watching. Yes. To bad, my God is a stalker. It's good, sometimes. :D Yeah, and He's always there when you need Him. :D

Went to KLC for dinner. And after we ate up our meals, fellowshipped [if there's such word... Mozilla underlined that word as a typo]... Sabrina asked us [Brian, Anndrea, Jean and I] of how we jog our brains, 'cause she has difficulty trying to get her mind working hard. College life made her think too much "in the box" instead of "out of the box". Eff colleges which limit creativity. Theories, theories and MORE theories. To me, I wouldn't want to get into a routine like that. Study, work, retire, get old, and then get 6 feet under. NO! NO ROUTINES! I want to go 6 feet under in style. I don't want to die regretting my past!

Ha, nowadays, people get locked in a set of rules, or what we call the "norm of the society," as the say. I say... BULLSHIT! Humans are made to follow rules, and it's true. But humans are not made to be like dogs. Sometimes, it takes a hard hit to realise that you've been living a dog's life for a hell long time. Don't wait for it to happen, 'cause it will be too late, most of the time. Life, to me, is complete and fulfilling if you lived it "out of the box" everyday. Doing mad stuffs. Loving yourself and God. Embracing your identity in God and in the world. Loving people. Caring for people. Heck, if I don't get to be a doctor or chemical engineer, I'm so going PR or design.

To my peeps out there. Don't wait for something bad to happen to make you realise that you could have lived a more satisfying life when you were younger. Do it now... NOW.

Don't know why I said this... But I think it's because I'm sad to see many people living routine lives... =( No I don't hate you. I love you. But it sucks... See?

[You... Will I ever see you again? =/]

Oh, saw this shoe in Mid Valley and I so want it! Tell me your opinions! BTW, the red part is a-la hair kind of material, while the black part is PVC-ish material weaved into fabric form. PUMA El Rey Pony! :D




Loves ♥

Till the next post.

=CHIcken WINGs=

Bugger.

Stop shaking your legs! It's so annoying!
Stop answering your calls as if your grandma is going to give birth the next jiffy that comes!

Those were the thoughts that jogged through my mind back and forth like an annoying drunk fly that keeps turning around your head.

Those monkeys can't stop bugging other people in class. Whatever. And YES, that compulsory KPP class really educated us about being PATIENT, especially with soon to be bugger drivers. Pfft.

Watched "When In Rome" yesterday. Was a pretty nice show. It was too short, though. *sighs* I miss the good old times. I dislike growing up. It feels like time pasts too fast now. Time, oh Time, why do you have to treat me this way. Can you not mess with Age?

I feel like I really need someone to love, and likewise somebody to love me back. Desperation? Likely.

Nothing much to say for this post, except that I saw a super-awesome shoe in Mid Valley, and I so want to get it. *sighs*

+CHIcken WINGs+

Sometimes I'm emo. Understatement of the year.

Heck, I'm emo most of the time. Not worth the adrenaline rushing in my veins and being high for no freaking reason all the time. FML. Yesterday's class was a success, at least from my perspective. You know why? Because there was a good turn up by my students. And you know why they all turned up. Because they had no choice. HAHA! They should have AGM meetings at least once a month so I can have classes with full attendance [but then it wouldn't be an ANNUAL general meeting anymore, ain't it?]. Whatever. Just come and bring your brains and books along. Don't make me microwave your heads.

BLAH. Was going to bed early yesterday when I realised how lonely I am without few of my close buddies. Most of them are so busy right now. Or so I think. Miss them tonnes, but how often do they think of me? T^T I went to bed rather emo last night. BLAH.

Realised that that taking the first step to approach that special somebody is harder than it looks. I haven't had any problems talking to people, but the thought of talking or even greeting that special somebody just makes my mouth lock itself by some imaginary superpower. Man, I really want to say it, but URGH. I can't. I wished I haven't got any emotions in the first place. T^T

Love you.

And all my peeps.

And readers.

And... snakes?

=CHIcken WINGs=

Back from a short MIA. ;)

Came back from Universiti Teknologi Petronas EduQuest camp thingie yesterday. Ooof. So tired. Didn't really make too many friends. Not all of them were friendly. Whatever. But then again, friends that I made there were nice people. ;)

Am thankful again for all the birthday wishes that I got from my friends and family members, though I wasn't in KL to reply all your messages XP. But then again, thanks a lot, love you guys a lot. Seriously. ^^ Super thankful too when I knew I got shortlisted for that interview thingie. It seems that 11000+/- people applied for the Petronas sponsorship programme, but only 2100 were shortlisted for the programme. And only 600 will be taken in. *shivers* But God will make a way. ;)

Dropped Josh off at church before coming back home to go online. Finally I can go online after 1 1/2 days. FML. ;D

Loves.


=CHIcken WINGs=

Awesome sh*t. ;)

It's a WTH moment for me today. Yeah. Totally WTH. I got shortlisted for Petronas' scholarship. Yes, awesome sh*t I tell you. ;D Good stuffs happening to me lately. Am happy it is. Clearly, God is blessing me greatly with all these stuff. It makes me stressed out sometimes, thinking of how to share all these good stuffs to everybody. Sometimes, when you get too much of all these good things, you kinda' go nuts 'cause there's hardly anyone to share it with! Human emotions and all that.

I'm turning a bit ancient next week. Which is not a good sign. It means I'm officially aging, and that puts me in a position where I can die of any sickness in a jiffy. Bah. Whatever. Death is not going to stop me from enjoying my awesome journey. AHA!

Would love to get these weird things for turning a year ancient next week:
@ Leather jacket... PURPLE leather jacket!
@ Orange slacks/pants!
@ White-rimmed aviators!
@ Nokia N97/ E72... Yellow ones, to be more awesome!
@ WhataboutTMNETUNIFI! Fibre optics galore. [Hope it's not all shit like copper wires]
@ Lime green sneakers!
@ White loafers!
@ Yellow iPod!
@ Glow-in-the-dark hair dye, if they even exist...
@ Lava lamp?
@ Earrings! [I haven't got my ears punched... FML =/]
@ Panasonic GF1/ Olympus E-PL1!
@ BOOKS! Currently bored. A-Levels Maths and Chemistry would keep me occupied. ;D
@ Noise-cancelling earphones. [I don't really know why I need those.]
@ A box of cigarettes?
@ Photochromic glasses for my room windows. I hate the glare. ISH.
@ Japan trip? AWESOME.
@ Yellow canvas bag! VOODS!
@ Sony PSP!
@ Nintendo DS Lite!
@ *HALO GLOWING* PS3.... *drools*
@ Technical pens?
@ Compilation of illustrations from top game artists of the world! VOODS!
@ Miley Cyrus' songs to never play on any form of media anymore.

Friggin' long list. PIGASS. ;)

Blah. Peephole, just keep counting on God and awesome stuffs can happen. It's so good that you can't believe it's happening. Shut up and believe me.

=CHIcken WINGs=

"Thank You" list.

In approximately a week's time, I will be turning 18, literally. Time flies. It's as if I was a baby yesterday, and Mum had less crow's feet and Dad had less railway tracks on his forehead. And now I'm done with secondary school, looking forward to pursuing my dream career as a doctor, if not a chemical engineer. *sighs* I'm getting old. XP

Looking back on my life, it's been a real blessing to be alive. Everything that has happened seem to be already pre-planned by God. Nothing ever fell out of hand, and no trouble was too much of a problem. Even the interview today under the Malaysian Public Services Department, is fated by God to happen. Imagine this. 18840 applications, only 8640 will be sitting for the interview, and only 1500 will be taken in. I'm in the 8640, and hopefully, also in the 1500.

So, what's my "Thank You" list all about? Turning 18 with sweet and sour experiences will not be complete without "thank you"s to the people who have stuck out with me through thick, thin and thinner. ;)
Big thanks to:
1. God, for making all things so perfect. ;)
2. Mum, for being pregnant so painfully with me. Taking care of me when I was down with bronchiolitis. [Mum and Dad diligently woke up every 4 hours to bring me for nebulizer sessions.] ans everything you provided me with.
3. Dad, for working so hard until you have railway tracks down and across your forehead.
4. My cousin sister Maryann, for being such a mad-cap since we were kids. Taking in all my madness, and also haring all your madness. Hell, I love all the madness. All the encouraging words during my "scholarship periods" did help a lot, too.
5. Primary school friend, Anis Zainab, wherever you are, thanks for being such a friendly girl! Always super-friendly and willing to befriend others. ;)
6. Arron, for being my best bud in primary school, and even until now. Love your caring family!
7. Celine Yap, yes you! AHA! I owe you none now~ Thank you post for you! Thanks so much for always listening to my complaints, even when you are super the busy. Loved all the nutty stuff we did together. EH! Bila mau jogging? XP
8. Caleb Ong, for accepting who I am. And also being open to my nuttiness all the time.
9. Becka Raj! YOU! Yes, thanks for being giler so that I have people to giler with. Church will be a bit of a bore if you weren't there.
10. Brian ONG! Super-duper thank you for always sending me to church. Like almost every week now. Really, you don't know how much it means to me.
11. The TOUCH group members, for making the experience of becoming a youth and a Christian awesome.
12. Joash and Joe, for being awesome leaders. I don't know how to say this, but I've seen you guys displaying leader qualities and I've learnt a thing or two down the line.
13. To my awesome teachers, Puan Sa'emah, Puan Thila, Madam Lim, Mr. Ken, Miss Wong and Mr. Sai Mun. You guys are great! "Thank you" is hardly enough to express my gratitude.
14. OMG! Lee Marilyn for also being a nut and menggiler all the time with me! It's fun to be giler with you!
15. Godson Chok Kam, for being such a great kid. Boy, you're awesome. ;)
16. My juniors that I miss so much! Meng Joe, Ah Hong, Shu Nee, Yik Shen, Ernest Lee, Fabian and many more who I can't recall. Study hard OK?
17. All my other friends and family members for helping make me who I am today. ;)

Alrighty. List done. ;) Wishlist! OMG... Whatever.

Loves.


=CHIcken WINGs=

URGH. Phail-case.

Today was phail-case maximum. Me no likey Easter celebration this year. Did not turn out pretty well for me. URGH. Im'ma throw shit at anybody who annoys me right now. Not just any shit, the kind of shit you get when you have food poisoning. HOWABOUTTHAT?!

URGH. Well, first phail-case was that BM service did not really compiled their songs nicely and hadn't got a clue what songs they're gonna' sing at all. Heck, I've done this lyricking thing for quite a number of years now, but I don't have the song database in my head or anything. Fuh. And when the lyrics are not on screen, it's as if it's my fault that it's not on screen. FUH. And I get weird stares from people. *rolls eyes* Come on, try doing what I do for a day. You wouldn't survive even halfway through the service. [Not that I'm whining or anything].

Second phail-case. Well, Alynna was going to perform second right after the BM Dept has settled with theirs. Well, I got the song last minute. And... The song... *sighs* Wasn't quite the well edited version. Ain't blaming Alynna. Screw websites who edit their friggin' downloads. To hell with them. Back to the topic. Well, when the song came on the speakers via P.A system, it sounded like some freaking DJ talking BEFORE the song actually came on... And somehow in the middle of the song, there's some scratching sound, produced by some damned DJ scratching some plate thing on the DJ booth. Eff it. People were staring at me as if I DID THAT? WHOTHEEFFYOUTHINKYOUARESTARINGATMELIKETHAT?! You guys think I'm not serious with what I'm doing, come and fucking do what I do-lah! *smirks in your face*

Well, I don't care who the eff you are. I don't go around throwing my respect at anybody. You want respect, earn it. And you're not earning mine at all. All I can say is, TRY BEING ME THEN!

At the end of the day, humans suck shit like mad. Only God knows that I'm doing what I'm supposed to do. I only care about that. Yes. I don't give a damn of what YOU PEOPLE think about me. Yes, you can suck up all the shit now.

Off to clean up the shit people have given me.

"Bloody hell, where's the eff-king bottle of bleach?!"

Loves for those who understood me, even when some dumb-ass humans don't.

=CHIcken WINGs=

P.S: If you expect a humble apology, I'm afraid you're at the wrong site. Please press "Next Blog" tab on top of this page.

Easter

Easter's play was good. Hopefully it did convey the message well enough. Am quite satisfied, but there's still place for a lot of improvement. *sighs*

Super-duper-the-grateful for everything I have in my life right now. Of course, I do desire for more... But then, having the people I love and care for around me is enough for now.

Interview is next week. I'm going to blow the panel of interviewers' minds to smithereens! No certain hints of "kan-cheong"-ness for now. ^-^

Loves, to God, and the people I love. ;)

=CHIcken WINGs=

OMGawd. I'm drowning in an ocean of blessings.

Okay. The title implies a lot of things here.

Ocean. Drowning. Two very closely-knit words, as if they were couples for the past few eons. And yes, I'm literally drowning in a sea of blessings. Not that I'm complaining about this, but things are happening at such a horrifyingly quick pace that it's an instant when compared to a blink of an eye.

Rushing seems to be the best thing that I can do for now. But then again, what benefit does it bring at all. *Sighs* I'm starting to feel like I'm turning into an artifact. Ancient and old. Probably it's because my back is killing me. Been having recurring back pain since late Form 4. It hasn't got this bad before. Now, I feel it everyday. It sucks, a lot. And there's nothing much I can do about it.

Ah. Let me cut the crap here. Now on to the blessings. Attended prize-giving ceremony in school, due to good results. My wallet ended up being heavier by RM175. I also got two GSC vouchers to be used! Awesome stuff.

But the awesomest thing is that I'm still alive. Really, nothing can beat the blessing in being alive for so long. Heck, I had near-death experiences three times in my life. Beat that. XP I believe God has bigger plans for me. But then again, it annoys me that He makes it so full of suspense. *laughs* Well, that's Him alright. =)

Readers, I wish that you will be blessed abundantly this week. Okay, maybe not this week alone. What about the whole month then? *Does the "Whatever~" hand-gesture*

Loves.

=CHIcken WINGs=

Experiences @ HKL.

Yes, I just got back from Hospital Kuala Lumpur from the Program Pendedahan Kerjaya Sebagai Seorang Doktor. Have been in the hospital for the past 2 days. Approximately. It has been quite a good experience I must say. I met nice people, cocky people, and people with bullet-proof glasses. You get what I mean. All fancies of people. XP

Day 1:
I was at the hospital at 6.20 a.m in the morning. WTH an 18-year old would be doing in the not-so-wee hours in the morning, heck, in a hospital?! Yeah, the Polis Bantuan gave me queer looks. They must be asking "What the eff is this nutcase with a yellow bag doing here in the morning?". I'm too soaked in my own fantasies that I can't give a damn of what they think about me, what more about the people who are going to WTF over my appearance.

It was sad to see NONE of anybody whom I know there. Yes. I was like, *tuut, bored here!*. So there's this Indian girl who came in around 8.20 a.m? Lisa is her name. Yeah, we became impromptu friends then. And I met her friend, Jeremie and another early bird too, Jia Xin. Yeah, and later on we had to break into several groups.

WTF. We got a boring tour, just on the first day of this programme. *laughs* Someone has to suck up the shit, like it or not. XP Orthopedics. Nothing much to see. Just bones, and skeletal related matters. Amputations and the likes of it.

And moving on later, we went to look at the General Surgery department. No, no live surgeries. Only a lecture. Vascular surgeon if I'm not pretty much mistaken. BAI to the hospital after that.

The journey home was awfully fun. Literally. Awful part first. I walked from GH/ HKL all the way down to Jalan TAR. Yes. I was dumb. XP It's my first time here as a student, and ALONE. And I take U11 which takes me back to my house no problem. OK... But then I realise he's going the opposite direction of the way I'm supposed to be following... T-T So, I ended up paying RM1 + RM2 for "passing" to stops. WTF. It's still anytime better than taking the taxi though. Nice part. I never get to view the traffic and sights of KL that often. So, as I walked, I looked at people and all the cartoon stunts that they're trying to imitate. Was fun. Improvised form of fun, so to speak.

Day 2 [Today]:
Today arr... Ermm... Today go to O & G lo. Obstetrics and Gynaecology. Nope, no delivery of babies too. Sad. Nothing much there really. Forensics? Yeah, we only got to see a body getting sanitized. That's all. =.=||| The other groups got to see the post-mortem in action, WTF?! Sighs.

And last session was at the Outpatient Dept. Not really hectic too. What I saw? I saw a head nurse cleaning up a small wound of a diabetic patient. Area of wound roughly 1.5cm X 4cm. Depth of wound approximately 3cm at the deepest point. I was like, "Ugh" not because it gross, but it's because it feels pain. XP

What I really disliked about this programme has got nothing to do with the programme at all, but I really disliked the people that came. How do I put this? HEH. I had thought that A-class students are going to be, from the point of aptitude, be good. PFFT. My foot to that statement now. Some of them, so cocky their heads can't see the ground. Some of them HAVE to talk while the nurses and doctors are briefing. What bitches are they. [No holds barred to that statement. Smart students SHOULD be street-smart too, not book-smart] I mean, coming in as a potential JPA scholar, what is that kind of attitude man? Some reflection please. Yeah. And some of those nuts have to see more "colour-blind" and weirdos like me. Haven't seen a guy with varnished nails and a yellow bag before? Sad for you, you haven't seen the world. Can't handle me? How then, can you handle a whining patient? I KASIHAN BAGI PIHAK YOU. And yeah, for those who are down-to-earth, do expect to see stuck-up students when you join this programme. I was not expecting to see so many pain-in-the-necks, but I stand to my weird styles and principles. Can't handle me? Go get LD50.

Stuffed.

LOVES.

*Aww man, why'd you have to be taken? XP*

=CHIcken WINGs=

And the best thing that happened today? I got two vouchers to GSC for free! XP

LD50-ed for now.

Program Pendedahan Kerjaya Sebagai Doktor- From the eyes and ears of a soon-to-be-hopefully-scholar

I have not blogged in a long time, considering the fact that I call myself a blogger. Yeah, whatever. Haha. Got shortlisted for this programme. [If you're reading this because if you're a hopeful to get this, read on. If you're hoping to hear me rant, wait for the next post. Back-to-back post, no worries] This programme, basically, is to show the soon-to-be-scholars the work and the responsibilities of becoming a doctor. The job of a doctor is indeed a noble job, but it's not as easy as many think it is.

Blah #1:
The life of a doctor is tough. TOUGH. Not simple. But plainly speaking, if you're in for it, because of passion and your aspiration and perspiration and BLA, BLA, BLA, so why not go for it. It's about the experience. Housemanship is tough, too. For the duration of the two years, you'll be spanked, whacked and scolded, not literally. But later on, after housemanship, you'll be much better. Less stress and all. During housemanship, it's all about "spare the rod, spoil the child."

Blah #2:
You are expected to be very ready to sacrifice whatever you may have on you. Don't expect to go home on time, although there is a set working time. You may have to stay back to tend to the patients' needs or to finish up your work for the next day so you'll avoid getting sound left, right, centre and all crevices of your body. Accuracy and punctuality is everything.

Blah #3:
Becoming a doctor is ALL ABOUT SERVICE. Literally. Nothing comes first except your patients. Yes. That's the naked truth. I didn't say it in a somber, dark tone. It's a serious, determined voice. Yes.

Blah #4:

[OKAY, I continued with this like 4 hours later because I lost my train of thoughts. Damn to hell short-term memory problems]

Heck, there's nothing much left to say. But generally, as an aspiring doctor, never let anything drive your will to study medicine unless it's own your own freewill and desire. Heck, never let anybody hold YOUR future. Do what you love to do. What I think about this programme and all? It's a good thing, but in a way it's too short to really see the stress and pressure working as a doctor. My experiences? See the following blogpost, alrighty? XP

Peace out.

Loves.

=CHIcken WINGs=

Untitled #3

EMOU I TELL YOU.

EMOU.

Stuck at home and not being able to go out to work, nor go online in the morning. It's killing me. I'm so liking someone now, but not in a very ready position to go tackle that special somebody. Sad. Being able to see that person but not being able to say "it" is very hard. SUPER HARD. T-T

And... *sigh* Some friends only bug me when they need something. Not all of them-laaa. I still love and care for my buddies. But then, most of them aren't there for me when I need them. Most of my SMS-es are rejected. Sad case humans.

I did some drawing and sketching. Cheered me up a little. Ha, let me tell you this, if you don't wanna' layan me, my pencil box, sketchbook, A4 papers and God will cheer me up. Don't super-perasan. *bleks*

HMM. Call or don't call? I'm lazy you know?

+CHIcken WINGs+

Castle Age on facebook is fun. Random statement.

OOO. Sothefreakingfrustratinglahalltheseformsyoucantevenfilloneupwithoutahiccupish.

So yeah. Results for SPM was announced like 5 days ago. Getting good results doesn't mean the hassle and rush stops there. Now, with all the scholarships open for registration, OMG the rush to photostat, certifying documents and sending application is just mad.


PLAIN MADNESS I TELL YOU!


But am really thankful, really to all those who prayed for me, even some that I might not know that were doing so. So, I want to say a biggie' thanks to you guys. But my utmost feelings of appreciation goes to God. He knows what I desire, and He doesn't hold His blessings back, not even a bit.

FUH. The simplest scholarship to apply so far is the JPA Scholarship, and hopefully I will get it *shivers* Shell and Petronas scholarships are rather troublesome to apply. ISH. But I'mma call them up and bug the phone operators. I'm so getting panicky if I can't get my application through... T-T

Nevertheless, life must go on. Promote promote! Brothers' and Sisters' Day coming real soon. FUH. Publicity is kind of fun! But... Hmm... I'm still unsure. Blah. And the next tutoring session is coming up in two weeks, so whoever friends that are attending, come early-laaa. Joanna requested for an Additional Maths tutoring session... Sad. How to cram together so many sessions? T-T

Advice to my younger peeps, try hard. And don't hope for good things to fall on you. X) Yang pipih tidak datang melayang, yang bulat tidak datang bergolek. =P




=CHIcken WINGs=

EPIC YES!

Today's class was a small success. Hoping for more turnouts soon. But then again... More turnouts equates to higher pressure. Hmm. It's okay, nothing too hard. ;D

Turnout was OK. 2 persons. It's rather OK for me, as I'm just considered a rookie teacher. But I love it~ XP

Am a little busy right now. Applying for scholarships. Waiting for the promo video for Brothers' and Sisters' Day plan to be okayed so we can start making it [hope it works though]. Working. Hmm. So far so good. Hoping scholarships can be approved. MWAHAHA! All in God's dear hands.

Hoping on God alone.

Aww man, now I'm kinda' missing you again.
XP

WTV.


=CHIcken WINGs=

YES! Good riddance sleepless nights, hello sweet dreams.

YES!

I made it.

Again?

=.=

Nah.

STRAIGHTS! To be honest, I'm more relieved than I'm happy. I did not expect to do so well this time, especially in the Biology and Malay Language paper. But praise be to GOD! I did well.

Bahasa Melayu [A]
Bahasa Inggeris [A+]
Mathematics [A+]
Additional Mathematics [A+]
Sejarah [A+]
Pendidikan Moral [A-]
Biology [A-]
Chemistry [A+]
Physics [A+]
English for Science and Technology [A+]

Yesh, God is that marvelous. Been acing government-based exam from UPSR up until SPM. What other plans He has for me? I don't know. But I'm sure it's gonna' be a fun one, I'm sure. Congrats to my buddies too. Whether you did well, or you did not, it still doesn't change how your friends love you. It's the same always and forever. ;D

Loves.

Joon, where are you?

=CHIcken WINGs=

Fuh..fuh...fuh....! FOUND IT! [JPA info]

It's so hard to find these kind of crap, especially when they don't really show it in all the public newspapers. These are the important details that you need to note when you are going to apply for Public Services Department scholarships.

General terms and regulations: [translated from the e-sila webpage, pardon my errors]
1. Malaysian citizen [D'oh!]
2. Not exceeding 18 years in age [19 years old for those who were in remove classes before] by the 31st December 2009. [What for? Aren't those who are in remove classes before 18 years in age by the 31st December 2009??]
3. Possessing good health and not suffering from chronic diseases such as hepatitis, Acquired Immunodeficiency Disease [AIDS], etc.

Courses:
Medicine [United Kingdom, India, Ireland, New Zealand, Russia, Poland and Czech Republic]
Dentistry [Australia, India, Ireland, New Zealand, United Kingdom]
Pharmacy [Australia, New Zealand, United Kingdom]

AT LEAST an A- in the 9 of the following subjects:
1. Malay Language
2. History Studies
3. Islamic Studies, As-Sunnah and Al-Quran Studies, Syariah Laws Studies OR Moral Studies
4. Physics
5. Chemistry
6. Biology
7. Mathematics [Modern Mathematics]
8. Additional Mathematics
9. English Language


Veterinary Medical Science [Australia, New Zealand, United Kingdom, Canada]

AT LEAST an A- in 9 of the following subjects:
1. Malay Language
2. History Studies
3. Islamic Studies, As-Sunnah and Al-Quran Studies, Syariah Laws Studies OR Moral Studies
4. Physics
5. Chemistry
6. Biology
7. Mathematics [Modern Mathematics]/ Additional Mathematics
8. English Language
AND at least an A- in any other subject.


Agricultural Science [United States of America, Australia]

AT LEAST an A- in 6 of the following subjects:
1. Malay Language
2. History Studies
3. Islamic Studies, As-Sunnah and Al-Quran Studies, Syariah Laws Studies OR Moral Studies
4. Biology/ Science/ Additional Science
5. Mathematics/ Addiotional Mathematics
6. English Language
AND at least an A- in the following subjects:
7. Physics/ Chemistry/ Agricultural Sciences/ Agrotechnology Studies/ Geography/ Economics/ Commerce [Perdagangan]/ Principles of Accountancy


Biotechnology [United States of America, Australia, United Kingdom, Canada]

AT LEAST an A- in 8 of the following subjects:
1. Malay Language
2. History Studies
3. Islamic Studies, As-Sunnah and Al-Quran Studies, Syariah Laws Studies OR Moral Studies
4. Physics/ Chemistry
5. Biology
6. Mathematics
7. Additional Mathematics
8. English Language
AND at least an A- in any other subject.


Engineering [United States of America, Australia, New Zealand, United Kingdom,
Canada, Germany, France*]

AT LEAST an A- in 8 of the following subjects:
1. Malay Language
2. History Studies
3. Islamic Studies, As-Sunnah and Al-Quran Studies, Syariah Laws Studies OR Moral Studies
4. Physics
5. Chemistry
6. Mathematics
7. Additional Mathematics
8. English Language/ French *(for those who intend to take their course in France)
9. Biology *(for those who intend to take their course in France)
AND at least an A- in any other subject.


Actuarial Science [United States of America, Australia, New Zealand, United Kingdom]

AT LEAST an A- in 8 of the following subjects:
1. Malay Language
2. History Studies
3. Islamic Studies, As-Sunnah and Al-Quran Studies, Syariah Laws Studies OR Moral Studies
4. Additional Mathematics
5. Mathematics
6. English Language
7. Physics/ Science/ Additional Science
8. Chemistry/ Economics/ Commerce/ Principles of Accountancy OR ICT
AND at least an A- in any other subject.


Accountancy [Australia, New Zealand, United Kingdom]

AT LEAST an A- in 7 of the following subjects:
1. Malay Language
2. History Studies
3. Islamic Studies, As-Sunnah and Al-Quran Studies, Syariah Laws Studies OR Moral Studies
4. Mathematics
5. Additional Mathematics/ Science/ Additional Science
6. English Language
7. Physics/ Economics/ Commerce/ Entrepreneurship Studies
AND at least an A- in any other subject.


Law [Australia, United Kingdom]

AT LEAST an A- in 5 of the following subjects:
1. Malay Language
2. History Studies
3. Islamic Studies, As-Sunnah and Al-Quran Studies, Syariah Laws Studies OR Moral Studies
4. English Language
5. Mathematics/ Additional Mathematics
AND at least an A- in any other 4 subjects.


Business Administration [United States of America, United Kingdom]

AT LEAST an A- in 6 of the following subjects:
1. Malay Language
2. History Studies
3. Islamic Studies, As-Sunnah and Al-Quran Studies, Syariah Laws Studies OR Moral Studies
4. Additional Mathematics/ Science/ Additional Science
5. English
6. Commerce/ Principles of Accountancy/ Entrepreneurship Studies
AND at least 3 A-'s in the following subjects:
7. Mathematics/ Economics/ Physics/ Chemistry/ English for Science and Technology/ Geography/ ICT [Information and Communication Technology]




There are a few more that I have not translated because it is not relevant to our school students at all. If you want to check it out [it's in Bahasa Malaysia, though], here's the link ^^

http://esilav2.jpa.gov.my/esila_new/piln/doc/syarat/syaratPILN_JPA_MARA_2010.pdf


Good luck for tomorrow guys.

I'm bloody nervous, really.


Loves.



=CHIcken WINGs=

OFF WITH THEIR HEADS!

Just came back from watching Alice in Wonderland. The movie? Was OK to boot. Not very much of a hoo-hah as everybody is saying. To me, it was a major setback, because I expected more from Tim Burton. Well, maybe it's just not up to the mark-lah. Well, I loved the graphics in the movie. Was damn awesome. Character designs and concepts are a bloody good masterpiece. What was good is that there are many random moments in this movie that kills the boredom of the movie.

Not for purists I say. But if you are an avid fan of Burton, or love seeing weird and wonderful graphics, this is the movie to see. I'm missing somebody. That's odd. I hadn't felt like that last week and the week before. Sheesh.

Loves.

=CHIcken WINGs=

"OOO, spoon!"

Aftermath? What's that?

Checking my blog to see whether everything is OK with it. It goes all nuts sometimes. Adam Lambert's Aftermath is up and playing. It's really meaningful, not his normal "I-love-to-scream-in-my-songs" kind of song.

Suddenly feeling kind of sh*tty. Well, it has got something to do about this afternoon. Blah. It's no use for me to go all EMO about it anymore, 'cause I did no harm to anyone, or by any means try to cause harm to anybody indirectly. Am getting over it pretty well. It's going to be just another week. I hope not. It's a curse to pass through every week as if it was a routine. Yes, I can't let you fool me [random].

Currently thinking about my future. Knowing that God already has my future laid out well, I'm not really fearful, but sometimes a little worried. Human nature. Can't avoid it at all.

Relating to the above stanza, am considering taking up something in the field of medicine as my future profession. Think about it, having M.B.B.S [Bachelor of Medicine and Bachelor of Surgery] qualification. But the competition is stiff, deadly and competitive [why the heck did I say deadly at all?]---------.....

If it's not God's plan for me to do Medicine, hopefully I will be able to pick up Chemical Engineering, if not Chemistry, Biochemistry or Biomedical Science. What about being a pathologist, anyone?

This Thursday decides MOST of what might happen in my near future. But ultimately, God will put everything into place, and I might just have to walk my journey of life that is filled with mad surprises. Bloody mad surprises. XP

Loves, all my buddies and readers.

Till the next post; HUGS~

=CHIcken WINGs=

Pieces of BLAHS and WOOTS.

Yes, it's less than a week before the results are officially out. It scares the sh*t of many people, especially the ones who are eager to get scholarships. Yes, I want a scholarship. And yes, it scares the shit out of me a little. Talk about constipated results. WTH.

This is so random. I'm watching AI * on 8tv. And WTF? Adam Lambert voter here! And Kara just said, "YOU ARE A ROCK GOD!". BLAH. I love my job. Just got back too long ago. Feeling better at work today than the other days. Work satisfaction perhaps?

The fact that SPM results are coming out soon is so like going to be a life-changing experience. It scares me. A lot. But I know God is up there in heaven, making sure those people holding my results make me get the straights of As. Hopefully A+ too. Hoping too much? Nope. My God is a giver.

"Jealous arh?"

HAHA!

LOVES


=CHIcken WINGs=

OMG SPM results!

Results are coming out on the 11th of March. Rumours or what? Not sure. So far, it's true.

Good luck guys!

=D

VERY KAN CHEONG!

=CHIcken WINGs=

;) Loves, hates and what again?

I'm sad. Today's tutoring session was bad. Not too bad. Only my sister attended. My other church friends that are supposed to come for the tutoring session FFK-ed me. T-T
SAD.

Whatever. I'm so going to watch the So-Must-See-Movie of the year, ALICE IN WONDERLAND. Why it's nice? It's not too childish. It's beautifully done. A-la gothic meets classical remake of the old cartoon version. Heck, it's only a storybook when Lewis Caroll written it. XP




Some random shoe that has got something to do with the movie I guess? o.O?

Couldn't get more pictures of the movie. Blogger can't load the stinking upload picture page.

Ha. Also annoyed that some friends always drop SMSes halfway. Annoyed big time. Not going to acknowledge your SMSes next time. I'm not going to beg for attention. I can round up some attention anytime I want time. WATASHIWA CHI WING-DES! No, I don't hate you, but sometimes you guys are a pain in the *ss. *hugs*

Results are coming out in approximately two weeks. WHEE! Attending a scholarship interview tomorrow. HAHA! Interviews are fun! XD More interviews are coming, WOOHOO!

Those who are constantly supporting me [Mum, Dad, bro and sis], friends and my wonderful cuzzies in my studies and decisions, HELL I LOVE YOU SO MUCH. Will you love me back? *wonders....*






MUAHS




KICKS




LAUGHS



=CHIcken WINGs=

Itu pun dia... Apa yang susahnya? =.=

Yes. Finally got those damned tickets. Wooh. It took me almost 6 hours for the bloody cue so that I can send my SMS for the tickets. ALICE IN THE WONDERLAND TICKIES! Who wouldn't want them?! Gosh. Was well paid off. WHEE! Bringing a few buddies to the movies I guess.

Am currently in a blur state. Maybe it was because of all the marking and catching up of the work today at my workplace. BAH. Heck, the radio announcer, Hunny Madu, called when I was walking to work. Pfft. Hot, atrocious weather. *cries*










Oh dear, where have you been? Missing you gigatonnes I tell you.♥









=CHIcken WINGs=

Untitled #2

CNY is almost reaching to a not-so-blasting end. The only thing that blasted my sanity out of my head was a hell lotta' loud firecrackers. "Bai Tin Gong" occasion not too long ago. Lemme' ponder what happened during the Chinese New Year. Not many happy stuffs, not too many rotten stuffs either. Only having this heartache sh*t. =(

#1: Not many people people really take into account of how much you care for them. Sad case. =/ Some of them just want to be choosy of who should really care for them. Yes. You and you cut me off. *frowns like I ate a super-sour tamarind* Go-la you! *JAI-HO!* Me don't wanna' give a damn of what happens to you anymore. xP You are a waste of my time.

#2: This CNY is much colder than the CNY's of the previous years. Why so? Perhaps many people are busy. And some things that are not supposed to be here during CNY are nicely misplaced around during the CNY period. So totally wanna' exorcise those evil stuffs. =X

#3: Kids are very straightforward. Too straightforward in fact. Chatted with Rebecca about our working experience at Kumon during CNY visitation to one of the church member's house. Kids are so nice, but they are a pain sometimes. Some of the kids can drive you up the wall and the ceiling. One of the kids there [Ethan is his name], who is very playful and sometimes, demanding. He does his work quite slowly because he likes play. So it takes him longer than usual to finish off his worksheets. So, I was made to supervise him on the Tuesday before the CNY week. I had to keep pestering him to finish, because the centre instructor told me to do so. He continued playing around... =( And he pretends to do his work when the instructor is around, and continues playing when the instructor does not see him. Sad. And I had a bad fever with cold sweat that particular day. Having to look after these kids while being sick? =.=

I did not go work on the Friday before CNY. And Ethan asked Rebecca, who is also working at the same Kumon centre with me, "Teacher, the boy teacher didn't come because he's angry at me is it?". AWW. They do feel guilty too. And I thought he wanted to get rid of me. =D

I miss the kids there. Even if they are annoying, they are also my dose of happiness. Pay is not really much, but the satisfaction of working there is indescribable.

#4: I don't want to waste too much time thinking about chasing love anymore. The feeling of love sickness is just so unbearable. It sucks. WTF. You know what? I'm just going to live my life, and just let that special someone come by and chase me instead. For now, loving God and my family is good enough. Yes, still love you, but, I'm so whatever right now. *Muaxx~!*

How to kill the heartache? BLAST MUSIC! Teaching tuition. Working. Playing with the kids. Go online and bullsh*t. Exercise and workout the sweat. SLEEP. Drawing. =D

#5: Results for SPM is coming out soon. Hopefully I'm going to get into matriculation, if not, getting PSD Scholarship, Shell Scholarship or any other relevant ones. Wishing STPM candidates all the best for their results that are coming out this Thursday. For SPM candidates, good luck too.

#6: I want to watch the premier of Alice In The Wonderland movie by Tim Burton. But, nobody is as eager as me. And bloody crap, my credit expired when I had to use it to SMS a radio station for the premier tickets to the movie. Damn it. Whatever-lah. As if anybody cares.

#7: Don't die! You can't! xD



LOVES ♥





=CHIcken WINGs=

Emo. Alcohol. Sleep.

It's been a long time since I last updated. Haven't got any time during Chinese New Year. Busy stuffs going on. Blah. This year's CNY has been a lukewarm one for me. Nothing to be ecstatic over about. Heck, I'm emo during CNY. I don't know why. And no, it hasn't got anything to do with alcohol. =X

I think it was the second day of CNY that I felt rather emo. After chatting via SMS with one of my close buddies, I got really confused with who I really am. Big secrets that nobody will ever know except God. It's really killing me from inside. Sometimes I realise that whatever I do to cover this secret, it gets harder and harder to handle. Even worse, it's like me trying to run away from this big-ass problem.

For that, I'm still emo up until today. Trying to handle it nicely. I'm still a little blur. Must be the alcohol from yesterday. No more vodkas for me. Bloody hell, it's like drinking antiseptic alcohol. Laced it with Coke, but it still sucked sh*t.








Illegal. Yes, illegal. =(




=CHIcken WINGs=