Monday, 31 August 2015


So I am back here. Once in a while kind of thing. Perhaps a little update about how life has been.

Ever since my last post, nothing much has happened. Waking up every day is quite a small blessing in itself but I believe I have much more in life that I ought to be achieving.

First off, it was the first time in all the 6 semesters, that I did quite exceptionally bad in my exams. I have to say that I have put a lot of effort into my studies (but not too emotional this time) but I scored a measly GPA of 3.8. Well, my mum did say I did okay. Some friends did, too. However, being a perfectionist (or let's just put it this way, nerdy), naturally made me want to strive for the best and anything short of my expectations are considered as failures. Well, 3.8, to me, is a failure. 3.9 is the lowest I can accept. However, I heard of some friends who did far worse, compared to me. I guess I could allow for it this time and I am reminded yet again, I am only human.

Have been an intern at FRIM for the past 9 weeks, too. This is my third day enjoying post-internship freedom but worse is yet to come. In just less than a week, the next academic term commences and final year project starts with that, too. I do hope all goes well!

How about you peeps out there my dear readers? Talk to me. ;)

With love,


Thursday, 11 June 2015

What?! Has it been a month already?

So, it has been more than a month since I last logged in into this account. Guess stuff like studies can really take your time away!

I have been told many things in life that happens are governed by the choices you make. Sure, I can make a choice to take breaks instead of studying too hard but I think in the short run, the results of my hard work would pay off. And besides, no one is going to work hard for yourself, except you (unless of course, one has a golden spoon in his or her mouth at birth, that's a whole different story altogether).

Oh yes, did I mention that I failed to secure the internship opportunity to Japan. That's quite unfortunate. Perhaps, it may not be my turn to go just yet. Things may be good back here and guess I have to keep an open mind on things.

Finals is just around the corner and right after that will be me, heading to a lovely forest reserve and it will be me, trees and internship. Anything you want to ask, people?

Lots of love.


Sunday, 3 May 2015

Weekend combo!


The much needed break.

Life has been a little hectic in university the past month. First, there was the first test of the semester. At the same time, we had to complete a few assignments in a row. And right after tests, we have go on with the remaining assignments. It has been, I must say, a little tiring for me. But again, after all the assignments are complete and having a 4-days-in-a-row break, I am starting to feel refreshed and encouraged.

Test 1 has been good. I scored above average while many of my classmates didn't fare so well. I am thankful all went well for me. At the very least, I still have academia to back me up while I lack in the looks department. (giggles)

Oh, and lately I have this funny experience to share. Have you had the experience that you have to keep working and there are numerous tasks ahead of you. Then you realise that you actually completed most of them and you have totally forgotten about it. Then, you browsed through your document files to find them already completed and you are then reminded that you have done them a long time ago. Feels great, right? I had that experience just a few days ago. I am starting to sound like a full-time workaholic.

This is a slightly more sad experience over the course of a few weeks. Most people have a price tag attached to them nowadays. How you look, what you wear, who you mix with, where you do your grocery shopping and have your meals and the list goes on quite a long way. All these determines your "price tag", your value. Some people already judge you before you even get to say anything. If you keep finding your worth within these pool of people who names your price, you will find your value dwindling to ever-lower values. Stop and know that one is worth much more than people can say. It's just sad that people fail to realise we are all humans. Sad.

Lots of love.


Tuesday, 7 April 2015


I used to think working with her in a group is quite a pain. Tough. Stressful. I thought she had an attitude problem. Well, I kept mum and I avoided working with her at all costs.

I thought I was wrong about her. Boy, was I really wrong about what I thought was wrong. A course mate of mine had her in the group. She wanted things to be done her way. She wanted to do all the tough and difficult titles. True, as university students, we ought to pursue stuff that's tougher so we all end up learning something. One catch, though. What is the point of choosing the tough titles if we don't end up understanding what we are doing? Some of us cannot even understand the title itself! (well, not me, one of my friend complained to me about this). And today, another friend came to me and she told me working with her is indeed tough. She wants it done her way (see the same pattern?), and the titles she chose for the assignment is way too difficult for an average student to understand (she is a perfectionist after all, even I can't beat her with my level of perfectionism).

Well, how do you cope with a perfectionist-egoist coworker? Tell me. ;)


Saturday, 4 April 2015

What's wrong with you people?

So today, I was looking at an article that my friend shared. It says that there are two doctors, more specifically, a surgeon and an anaesthetist, that volunteered themselves to carry out limb amputations in the light of the recent hudud enforcement in Kelantan. I was really taken aback by this. So, in the first place, did they even take the Hippocratic Oath. Even if they did, did they mean what they say?

After sharing the news on my own profile (along with a thought-provoking or rather just provoking statement) some Muslims commented on it and I found their replies very disappointing. To sum it up, it plainly say: If you know nothing about hudud, shut the hell up. Well, I am human enough to know that to amputate the limbs of others off is totally barbaric and heartless. Their reason for their support of hudud is that it is a form of deterrent to would-be criminals. Does this mean your people are so horrible that normal laws cannot govern their behaviour? I discussed the issue from the viewpoint of a rational human and they insisted I understand Islam before saying anything. In general, I would also say many non-Muslims also find hudud a little too extreme. Rather than forcing it down the throats of non-Muslims and calling us "kafir" and "jahil", why not take a little effort to understand our viewpoints. Don't Muslims call Islam the so-called religion of peace? If yes, then prove it. Take some time to ask around. All I can see is: You are a non-Muslim, what the hell do you know? What's more heartbreaking is, on social media, any Muslim that does not support hudud (just look at the comments in articles related to hudud on Facebook) will be branded "government ass-lickers", murtads and all kinds of insults. What Muslim are you when you call your own brethren such sickening names? My main concern regarding hudud is how it claims to not affect the lives of non-Muslims. I have to arguments I can make regarding this. Assuming hudud to be laws practised in Muslim countries, then let me take Turkey as an example. In the era of the Ottoman Turks, the Jannisary (Jannisari) was a special group of soldiers, supposedly elite soldiers with excellent backgrounds and especially in Islam. I came across a book in my university library while looking for information for my assignment. Lo and behold, I came across an ugly truth. In those days, firstborn males from Christian families are taken forcefully and are also converted to Islam forcefully, and they are then made to serve in the Jannisary. Secondly, in the pursuit of jihad, houses of worship are not to be harmed in any way or another. Then, why is Hagia Sophia converted into a mosque? Why wasn't it left as it is? Does this mean it was taken away by force from the Roman Catholics during the fall of the Roman empire? Why bring this up? The Medina Charter guarantees safe coexistence between Muslims and those who are not of the religion. However, one of the most successful Islamic empires have gone against simple rules written in the charter itself. Those were great Muslim heroes that have gone against the essence of the charter, so what more of Malaysian Muslims then, who do not have a history in Islam as old as the Turkish people? Could they guarantee that the rights of the non-Muslims be FOREVER protected? I doubt so. Let's also not forget that Malaysia is a multiracial country and it was never agreed upon that Islamic laws were to be used to govern the nation. Thus, in my opinion, EVERY citizen has the right to disagree upon hudud should they find it too harsh a law to be used, not just Muslims themselves. Muslims in Malaysia should prove that Islam is a religion of peace, not just claim it by mouth. If the Prophet can practise "musyawarah" then why can't you?

If this goes on throughout the nation, I am going to leave to another country. I can't stand seeing the minorities being suppressed. Perhaps, we should all move. I am far too disappointed with what I am seeing now. Oh, have I mentioned about GST, too? Not yet. End of rant for today.


Friday, 3 April 2015

Nasty two-week ordeal!

In every semester (well, for me at least), there is this special two-week period that seems to bring hell onto the surface of the earth and that's the time where the phrase "all hell breaks loose" seems to be the most suitable phrase to describe it, quite literally. Assignments, tests and presentations all come in deadly waves, threatening to break you down with every hit. Being a workaholic, somewhat a perfectionist and a paranoid all put into one, you might be able to anticipate my reactions to all these stresses.

Hell broke lose last week, during the first test. Thank goodness it was rather simple. Then things started to look bad. Economics lecturer misprinted the pages, so instead of having 40 multiple-choice questions to answer, it was scaled-down to 20, from 1 mark in the test to 0.5 mark in the total assessment ratio, it was changed to 1 mark in the test to 1 mark in the total assessment ratio. It only means we risk more marks being sent down to the bellies of the earth with every question answered wrongly... Wow. Then came organic chemistry. Our beloved lecturer gave us questions that she did not teach in class. She says this: Everything you have learned in your previous semesters can be used in this exam. I sat there, thinking to myself, what would I do if I flunked this test. Become a janitor? Waiter at a restaurant? Who knows. And last came thermodynamics. I couldn't complete the test in time (thank God I wasn't alone, 80% of the class had the same dilemma). What a way to end this two-week hell. Assignments are still dangling in front of me and no, it doesn't look enticing at all...

What makes this hell week worse? Demons from hell. No, not literally, I'd shit my pants if I saw one, or maybe half, or perhaps just a ghostly finger. Okay, demons from hell means mad people you say in your daily life. This particular incident annoyed me a lot last week and this isn't the first time such incident is happening. Now, here is the scenario: You have a social media account. You know very well that, unless you adjust your settings to be private or restricted to a specified group of audience only, then your social media account is virtually accessible for all to see. With that, I can now further explain what happened. There was this guy that I followed on Facebook and he had a mutual friend. And through that mutual friend, he asked this mutual friend of me and why did I even follow him in the first place. Then, he proceeded to block me. I went berserk. Firstly, who do you think you are? I am following him because I think he'd be a nice person. Turns out, he is just another asshole who thinks he is so popular that people are dying to get to know him. Please, don't be too full of yourself. It's not like you're some celebrity. Even if you are, I'd just show the magic finger in your face for being such a jerk. Secondly, if you are so afraid of people following you, there are functions in Facebook that prevents people to access your Facebook if one does not has proper connections. Also, do yourself a favour and inactivate the "Follow" button. Blame others for one's own stupidity and inability to use social media is just so silly. Well, I guess stupid people have to exist or else it's difficult to have people that are above-average.

This week is coming to an end and I am seeing the end of the tunnel (no, I am not dying) and yes, whatever I can see now looks good. Get the assignments over with and we chill like there's no tomorrow.


Saturday, 21 March 2015

Bucket List

So, I have been asked by a friend of mine to compile a list of things that I want to achieve before saying farewell to this realm for good.

It's true that life here is like the wind. Here a moment, gone the next. This Chinese New Year has been quite a depressing one for me. A devout church member, we call her Aunty Helena, has been a very faithful church goer and servant of the Lord. She was brought back to be with Him too soon. Aunty Susan's husband also passed away even before Chinese New Year was over. There, I sat thinking about life. What life means to me. And the past week, I also thought about life. I asked all kinds of questions pertaining to life. What ifs and hows? And my friend couldn't come at a more appropriate time to get me thinking about a bucket list I want to create.

Let's just say this bucket list is a list of all the things I want to achieve in life, hopefully I will be able to at least achieve half of them. I did not classify them but it reflects my short-term, long-term and also my desires.

1. Learn to play the zither or a koto.
2. Learn how to do the butterfly stroke.
3. Learn how to cook from my mother.
4. Write a chemistry textbook.
5. Write a motivational book (WTF?)
6. Write a work of poetry and it must be a hit.
7. Discover a material, substance or reaction mechanism that will revolutionize the world of science.
8. Win a Nobel prize.
9. Complete a PhD.
10. Bungee jump off a high-cliff.
11. Skydive off a flying plane.
12. Have my own boutique.
13. Have a fashion collection paraded down the runway at any one of the world's leading fashion capitals, preferably New York Fashion week, Tokyo would be good, too.
14. Own a house.
15. Own a Hummer.
16. Bring Mum and Dad for a holiday.
17. Get married.
18. Have children.
19. Be featured (even if it was a short, simple role, say, a waiter or a janitor) in a movie.
20. Travel to Japan.
21. Travel to North Korea.
22. Travel to Bhutan.
23. Travel to Nepal.
24. Travel to Bhutan.
25. Travel to Austria.
26. Travel to Poland.
27. Travel to Switzerland.
28. Travel to Sweden.
29. Travel to Romania.
30. Travel to Spain.
31. Travel to Russia.
32. Travel to the United States.
33. Travel to the North Pole.
34. Travel to the South Pole.
35. Scale Mount Kinabalu.
36. Oh yes, learn how to fix cars from dad.

I guess these are the things I want to achieve in life before I go. For now.

What is yours?

Hugs and kisses.

Yours truly,